Best A Mother's Reckoning: Living in the Aftermath of Tragedy By Andrew Solomon
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Ebook About The acclaimed New York Times bestseller by Sue Klebold, mother of one of the Columbine shooters, about living in the aftermath of Columbine.On April 20, 1999, Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold walked into Columbine High School in Littleton, Colorado. Over the course of minutes, they would kill twelve students and a teacher and wound twenty-four others before taking their own lives. For the last sixteen years, Sue Klebold, Dylan’s mother, has lived with the indescribable grief and shame of that day. How could her child, the promising young man she had loved and raised, be responsible for such horror? And how, as his mother, had she not known something was wrong? Were there subtle signs she had missed? What, if anything, could she have done differently? These are questions that Klebold has grappled with every day since the Columbine tragedy. In A Mother’s Reckoning, she chronicles with unflinching honesty her journey as a mother trying to come to terms with the incomprehensible. In the hope that the insights and understanding she has gained may help other families recognize when a child is in distress, she tells her story in full, drawing upon her personal journals, the videos and writings that Dylan left behind, and on countless interviews with mental health experts. Filled with hard-won wisdom and compassion, A Mother’s Reckoning is a powerful and haunting book that sheds light on one of the most pressing issues of our time. And with fresh wounds from the Newtown and Charleston shootings, never has the need for understanding been more urgent. All author profits from the book will be donated to research and to charitable organizations focusing on mental health issues.— Washington Post, Best Memoirs of 2016Book A Mother's Reckoning: Living in the Aftermath of Tragedy Review :
Should a reviewer decide on how many stars to give a book upon the entertainment value that the book brings or the content? I enjoyed Sue Klebold's book. But as the mother of four adult children who were ages twelve to twenty one when the slaughter occurred ( I hate that Klebold refers to this incident as "the tragedy". A tragedy is an earthquake or a tornado or a plane crash. Preventable cold blooded murders and the suicide of the murderers is not a "tragedy" ) I read this book with my hand over my eyes, peeking through my spayed fingers with a big knot in my stomach as I knew what was coming.Although I feel very sorry for Mrs. Klebold, and perhaps expected too much from her, I was apalled at how little attention was given to the victims. She was so busy attempting to absolve herself from any responsibility that the victims were only mentioned as an after thought. Many reviws on this thread mention the repetitive nature of the text. I don't think that it was so much repetitive as an incident would be recalled and then several pages later be retold with a different slant to it. For instance when she first tells us that her older son, Byron, moved out at 18 with her and her husband's blessings, but returned for Sunday dinners and enjoyed a good relationship with the family. Fifty pages later she reveals that Byron moved out of the house at the intervention of a family councelor. Byron plays a rather large role in the family dynamic. She tells us that he had difficulty keeping a job and accused him of giving Dylan marijuana. In so many words she describes Byron as a bit of a loser and clearly adores Dylan and he becomes the basket that holds all the eggs for Sue. She is an academic and is very excited about Dylan's college prospects. Byron clearly was not college material. Having two male children with this kind of dynamic established spells trouble to me. Both boys would be effected by this in different ways . Byron, of course, suffering from the feeling of being a disappointment to his parents and the quiet Dylan, clearly the apple of his mother's eye undoubtedly felt pressure under her expectations. This is barely noted in the book by Sue.I was also disappointed to hear absolutely nothing from the Harris family. I am sure it was their choice to not participate....but Sue was allowed to completely put the blame on Eric. This is absurd on it's face. I was fascinated by her research on the "suicide gene" but the theory that Eric wished to kill others and Dylan only wanted to commit suicide was offensive to ME. I can only imagine how it settled with the Harris'. Sue was very defensive about her family being "accused" of being well off financially. She wanted us all to understand that though her home was clearly a "compound" in the beautiful mountains of Colorado, it had been purchased as a fixer upper. The Klebolds were indeed well off. This becomes important when Dylan and Eric are caught stealing together. Children who are under privileged steal because of the obvious fact that they do not have the possesions that their friends do. When a child as privileged as Dylan was steals it becomes much more. We are lead to believe that Eric is "bad" and Dylan just blindly follows him into mischeif, and eventually a murderous rampage which was originally planned to be much more destructive than it was. Dylan willingly took part in making the explosive devices and it was his prom date that purchased some of the guns. This is also not fleshed out by Sue. Was this young woman held responsible in any way? I believe she should have been charged as an accessory to the crime.If that happened, Sue does not tell us.The fact that the Klebold's marriage did not survive this most heinous of abominations was also given short shrift by Sue. The family had been weakened by many factors that were not given their due in the narritive. We all know that Sue Loved Dylan. In my opinion Dylan was her everything. So much so that she made one excuse for him after another. She would explain a negative about Dylan and then inevitably make an excuse for him at the end of the paragraph. Didn't all teenage boys behave like Dylan? No, Sue. They do not. I am not necessarily judging Sue. I am sure I have done it myself. Sometimes parents just cannot bear to see what is right in front of their face. I feel that Sue Klebold kept her hands over her eyes with her fingers splayed, just as I did while reading her story, for many years of watching Dylan become darker and darker, until the lights went out completely. I was 14 when the Columbine massacre occurred. I can still vividly remember all of the news channels here in Minnesota constantly reporting on it. I remember this event so well because I quickly learned that they listened to the same music I liked, and so many talk show hosts blaming Rammstein and Marilyn Manson was just absurd to me. I remember reports that they had been bullied, and I was definitely bullied too. I saw similarities between myself and them and yet I couldn't understand why they did such a thing.Sue explains her thoughts, feelings, and actions thoroughly and I completely understand now why Eric and Dylan could have thought such a thing would help them. Mental illnesses are very cruel, and they victimize thousands, if not more, every year.I never blamed Sue nor any of the other parents for what Dylan and Eric did. I was 14, and I knew despite my unhealthy upbringing that my decisions were only mine to own. I feel terrible for what the Klebolds and Harrises went through. They were victims too, but in the most unfathomable and misunderstood way. THANK YOU SUE, for sharing your story, and sharing a little of Dylan with the world. You are not a monster for loving your son. 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